bioticbacon:

prompt: you can save the world

fShenko drabble, with spoilers for the extended cut dlc for mass effect 3.

this is entirely @capriswritingnartshenanigans fault

– – –

She was unsure what hour it was when the first cries reached her ears and pulled her from a light sleep, but by the darkness beyond the window, Catriona guessed the wee hours. Momentary, tired confusion shattered as she moved to gather the squawking infant in her arms from his side car, writhing against the soft blankets that had swaddled him so snugly.

“Hush now, my darling, you don’t need to cry.”

The baby’s wailing fell silent as he began to nurse with practiced ease, a fat hand curling against her skin as he calmed, and even in tiredness, Catriona took the chance to marvel at him, to admire him as she always did; the sweet, milky scent of newborn, the dark ebony hair, long sweeping lashes and neat ears that she now knew so well.

But then, she seemed to have known it all even before his arrival. Even before the newly restored EDI had given a run down of her scan findings, her thumb tracing the image of the tiny being who’s heartbeat filled the room; made in love and representing such enormous hope and reward.

Strong cardiac activity, a healthy foetus growing well. XY chromosomes. A significant number of biological markers identical to one Major K. Alenko. 4.2 inches long, 90 grams in weight. Approximately 15 weeks and 1 day.

The skyline of city lights laid beyond the glass before her in the still of night; what was the point of a penthouse apartment if you didn’t have a large enough window to admire the view, Kaidan had joked as they had built their home. Vancouver was rebuilding quickly, the skies already full of shuttle traffic and an endless buzz of activity. It was comforting, the reminder of life outside of her nest slowly regaining traction after the horror it had met. Not that she could claim to have engaged in it recently – her time had been otherwise rather occupied.

Now four days old, and he was still just the baby. She would insist it was a difficult last name that held up their choice, much to her husband’s disgruntled pout. The months of pregnancy had seemed to last forever, endless time to decide but now, the clock ticked; his grandmother was travelling that morning to meet him, he would need to be registered with the city and damned if she was sent another message asking for a name to put upon his gift. Even Kaidan had gently chivvied her into putting some serious thought towards a decision.

Her Kaidan. Patient, unfailing, gentle Kaidan who had held her hand so often and not once uttered a word of complaint, even as she had cursed him to hell and back with each contraction of her labour. Quiet, protective, loving Kaidan who had whispered affirmations in answer to her every anxious thought, who had made vows to love her eternally so easily as the cool metal of her wedding ring had met her finger, who had wept so fiercely as she had handed the baby to him for the first time. He snored gently into the pillow beside her, head turned from her, and in the light from the window, she could make out the same neat ears and soft, dark hair she had been admiring on her son. Their son.

The baby in question had quietly finished nursing, contented by a full belly and his mother’s arms, and endless dark brown eyes met hers in a gaze that seemed to still time. She had always been told infants were born with blue eyes, but here he was, with the same deep brown eyes that had first won her heart so many years before. In the haze of memory from labour she could see him lifted onto her chest, seconds new and with the sweetest of cries, and his eyes had found hers instantly, her very soul snapping into life with sudden realisation that she had no idea she had been missing. Oh. There you are. How could I ever not have known you?

The babe blinked, before his tiny features screwed into a yawn and as she adjusted her nightgown, Catriona brought him to her to kiss, thumbing the downy skin of his cheeks. The responsibility still overwhelmed her. Hell, give her an invasion of ancient sentient machines any day, but this was on an entirely different level. A gun, she could handle with every inch of familiarity and confidence. But a baby? A baby was something different entirely. Something fragile, something delicate. Life, in its simplest form. She was far more used to death, and the destruction and pain of it, of the grief of loss.

Her heart hurt when she wandered into the memories of that loss, of those that would miss this, that would be unable to share their elated joy. In all of it, one figure stood out, a gaping hole in her world and a pain that never seemed to settle. She could see him at the edge of her mind’s eye, could still hear his confident belief in her at every turn, the gentle smile that said ‘you can do this’. Their final conversation pulled itself often to the front of her thoughts more recently, and in every quiet moment of doubt, there he was. Oh how she wished he was still there to be the voice of sanity she had relied upon so often.

What about you? Ever think about settling down?

Yeah… I like the sound of that. Not sure I’d be much good at it though.

Sure you would.

I’m a soldier, Anderson, like you. Not really fit for doing anything else.

Movement next to her broke her spell, and as strong arms found her waist, Catriona realised she was crying, hot tears tracking down her cheeks. She leant her back into the muscle and warmth of her now awake husband, his face burying into the crook of her neck and his gruff, sleep filled voice reverberated against her skin, laced with concern.

“What’s the matter, love?”

He could read her so easily; had she been crying enough to waken him? Catriona wiped quickly at the dampness on her cheeks with her free hand, clearing her throat as best she could. “I was just… thinking about his name. Or lack of it, I guess.”

The tension in his shoulders seemed to drop with her admission as a tender hand reached down to trace the baby’s features. “We’ll find something, don’t worry. Boy can’t live without a name forever.”

“No, I…I think I know what it should be.”

“Oh.” Kaidan’s face lifted, his hand tucking an errant strand of hair behind her ear, before resting his chin on her shoulder. “Well, hit me.”

Catriona drew a breath, steadying herself, before glancing to him. “James for the middle… for your dad, like we discussed.”

His reply with a gentle chuckle, warmth in his eyes. “You’ll make my mother cry with that one.”

They felt silent again, Kaidan’s waiting gaze upon her once more, but Catriona found she couldn’t say it, couldn’t bring herself to give it voice. That meant he was really gone; meant finality. Her mouth was like cotton, thick and heavy, barely able to force the name from her lips and as she finally whispered it, her voice cracked. 

I don’t know Shepard. I think you’d make a great mother.

“David. I want to call him David.”

She felt the breath in him hitch instantly, the meaning of her suggestion sweeping over him first as a grimace of pain, before his brows knitted together in silent, sad contemplation and she turned enough to look at him almost desperately, eyes filling and throat catching once more. “He was like a father to me, I guess… he cared… for me, for you… he believed… he would’ve been so proud… he would’ve loved…” She could speak no more, composure shattering and descended quickly into heaving sobs, fat tears slipping down her cheeks as she clutched the babe to her. He would have loved to have been here to see this, to be a part of this.

Kaidan turned her in his arms so easily and she wept against him, face pressed against the tickle of chest hair as a hand traced circles on her back. Heaving sobs left her, chest burning with each breath – how it hurt, raw grief she thought had lost it’s sting. Her husband was silent other than soft murmurs of comfort for what seemed to be forever, and when he finally spoke the tremble in his own voice was answer enough.

“Yeah, that’s…that’s a good choice…” He pressed a kiss to her forehead, the baby settled in her arms. “David James Alenko. Now there’s a name.”

I’m proud of you. You did good, child. You did good.

ooachilliaoo:

Aww, thanks for the prompt my dear! I probably took this to
a slightly horrible and totally unexpected place but um…I hope you like it
anyway.

Also sorry it took so long!

---

Now that she was finally still, the blood pounding in her ears was
much harder to ignore. The sensation itself was not unusual, nor was the
synchronised hard, harsh beating of her heart.

It was just… she was usually being actively shot at when she
experienced these things.

He hadn’t shot her. Not physically, anyway. Even though, in many
ways, what he’d said was far more hurtful, far more complicated than a bullet.

She’d much rather he’d shot her.

Shouting at TIM would help, would’ve helped if she
could’ve managed it without jeopardizing her ship and her crew and her mission.
The few sarcastic comments she’d managed to slip in were a poor consolation for
the full wrath filled tirade he so deserved.

She should have gone to the gym afterwards. Even if, by ‘gym’, she
really only meant the corner of the shuttle bay where she and Jacob had stashed
some weights. Somehow, for all Cerberus had claimed they’d ‘upgraded’ her ship,
it seemed a fully working gym hadn’t been particularly high on their agenda.

But instead she’d ended up here, in her cabin, slumped in her
chair, staring at his picture on her desk with her heartbeat thrumming in her
ears while she vaguely wondered why it felt so much like a betrayal.

It wasn’t like she could hold him to a promise made two years ago.
Two years was a long time… at least, it had been for him. Apparently, she’d spent
the last two years sleeping.  

As a consequence, the memory was crystal clear…

Keep reading

okayhotshots:

A/N: EYYYY. So this was meant to be posted days ago, but I guess it’s a good piece to end my participation of Kaidan Appreciation Week on, because nothing like a little Shenko sexy time, am I right? This piece is inspired by this song and it’s slightly AU, still canon compliant though. It is NSFW, so be warned. Anyway, here goes. 

***

Kaidan’s never been very good at flirting. He’s always been
rose tinted cheeks and fumbling words every time he tries to approach someone.
He’s always felt a sense of uneasiness every time he’s stood before someone good
looking in a bar and asked if he could buy them a drink. But something about
gazing at her from across the bar makes all the weirdness in his stomach
settle.

He’s done this for weeks, came to Flux on his shore leave,
to knock back a couple of drinks and stare at her from a far, but he’s never
had the courage to even make him self noticeable, to put himself in her line of
sight, much less approach her. Every one regularly in this bar knows who she
is, they can take one look at her, and recognize her face. Shepard. Her name
has been whispered across Alliance Space for the past couple of weeks. She’s
the only survivor of the thresher maw attack on Akuze.

Kaidan has to admit. The fact that she’s out an about after
enduing something like that makes her allure even greater. The last time
something considered tragic happened to him, he went into hiding at his parents’
house for longer than he cares to admit. He realizes this might just be her way
of dealing, but she stands tall like nothing can bring her down. If you didn’t already
know what she had been through, you wouldn’t be able to tell.

She doesn’t usually talk to anyone. She stays in her corner
of the bar, eyes never settling anywhere in particular. He’s never seen her
come in with anyone and he’s never seen her leave with anyone. But it’s not
like no one in the bar hasn’t tried their luck. Kaidan was floored the first
time someone approached her. Cocky and grinning like he thought he had it in the
bag. He slid her a drink. She had merely glanced at it before tossing him a
piercing glare. He hadn’t heard the conversation. The music is always pulsing
so loud, and honestly, even if it wasn’t Kaidan hadn’t had the courage to get
that close to her, and seeing the most confident guy in the bar walking away
defeated did nothing to make him feel
better.

Tonight is different. There’s something in the air. He can’t
quite put his finger on it, but something makes
him sit a bit closer to her. His friends don’t question his motives. He’s
glad for the view, and wouldn’t care if they had. He knows next to nothing
about the woman, but he’s never felt a pull to someone this strong. He knows
how ridiculous it sounds. He just can’t help himself.  

For once, he allows himself to stare too long, allows
himself to imagine what she’s like, to think about what it might be like to
trace his fingers across her bare skin. His cheeks feel hot and he quickly downs
his drink, hoping that his friends might write it off as an effect of the
alcohol. Much to his surprise, when he lowers his glass, those blue eyes he’s
been admiring from a distance are on him. At first he thinks that he’s imagining
things, that maybe he’s had more to drink than he realized, but then she smiles
at him. It’s nothing extravagant, very subtle, almost has a “come hither” vibe
to it.

Kaidan’s heart starts thudding against his ribcage. For a
moment, he thinks that it might hop of his chest and make a break for it. He
couldn’t blame it, part of him wants to do the same. But another part of him,
an even bigger one, wants to obey the command that she might be giving him. He
knows that he might be turned down, that she might not even really be smiling
at him, but even the mere idea that she might be looking in his direction, is enough to give him the courage to push himself up from his seat and approach her. 

He can hear his heart in his ears. It’s pounding louder than even the bass of the music. He feels his own lips tug into a smile as he reaches her, taking the seat across from her. 

She’s the first to speak. 

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okayhotshots:

Childhood/Adolescence/Young Adult Life 

A/N: This is late, I got distracted yesterday. 

P.S. This piece is longer than originally intended. Oops. And it doesn’t entirely fit with the theme but eyyyy! (Seriously, there are TINY mentions of his teenage years. I shouldn’t even say this is the prompt but oh well)

Anyway, still, here it is!

****

Kaidan doesn’t like to talk about his teenage years, not really. Sure, he’s moved past most of the events that occurred on Jump Zero, he doesn’t let those moments define him, but that still doesn’t make them pleasant to talk about. 

But something about the intrigue in Shepard’s voice, the genuine interest in her eyes, made him want to open up. He wanted to know everything about her, and part of him hoped that she wanted to know the same about him. So when she came to him with an inquisitive voice, sat by him while he worked, not only enjoying his stories, but his company, how could he not oblige. 

One night she comes, after he told her about the incident with Vyrnnus, and sits next to him in the nearly abandoned mess hall. It’s past midnight and the only lights that are were on nearby belonged to ones that were shining through the windows of the infirmary. Kaidan kept glancing up from his data pad, bringing his coffee mug to his lips. He knows that all this caffeine late at night isn’t helping him sleep, but he can’t seem to resist the stuff. 

As she approaches him, he doesn’t have to glance up to know it’s Shepard. There’s something he can always sense about her presence. She brings a calmness with her that Kaidan has never felt before. 

Unlike other times they’ve sat near each other, she’s closer this time. She must know that no one is going to come by this late at night. He’s not complaining. He’s been looking and looking for excuses to get close to her. So when she settles next to him, her shoulder brushing his, he doesn’t object and he tries to hide the fact that his breath hitches in his throat. She makes him feel like a teenager again. Awkward and stumbling on his words, heart racing, only it’s so much different. 

She makes him feel knots in the depths of his stomach, and he’s hard pressed to even believe that just a touch of her skin against his can make him feel like his heart is residing in his throat.

“Kaidan,” she says with a soft smile. “What are you doing up?” 

He feels his hurt do some sort of ridiculous fluttering in his chest as she calls him by his first name. He doesn’t recall it happening before now and he likes the way it sounds rolling off her lips.

He returns the smile, sitting his data pad on the table. “I could ask you the same, Commander.”

Keep reading

okayhotshots:

A/N: This is my first Shenko in ages! It’s not very good, but I wanted to share anyway. This takes place when they go back to Horizon to go after Kai Leng. I hope that you all enjoy! 

****

She doesn’t want to be here. Last time she was here, the ground had crumpled underneath her feet. There she was, somehow back from the dead, looking at the man she loved, and his eyes were anything but forgiving. He didn’t welcome her with open arms. She doesn’t blame him. He had every right to be skeptical, but that doesn’t mean that it hurt any less.

After everything she had been through up until that point, having some familiarity would have been incredible. She’s supposed to be strong, the leader, the light in the dark. Showing weakness just wasn’t in the cards, but she knows that her crew noticed the shift in her after Horizon.

Even though it’s a different place, a different time and so much has changed, stepping back onto the soil feels wrong, almost like she’s walking backwards into a memory. There’s so much more she should be worried about. So many lives are depending on her, but she just can’t shake the feeling of sadness that had surrounded her.

It’s quiet. Too quiet. She knows that’s not good. That always means that enemies are sure to come their way, but instead of focusing on what could be coming at them, she’s thinking back to that day.

She remembers the swirl of nerves and excitement in the pits of her stomach at the very thought of seeing Kaidan again. She didn’t expect him to pull her into a kiss and embrace her like he used to, for all she knew, he could have moved on. But she expected something warmer than a one armed hug and hostile words. But maybe she was expecting too much.

I thought we had something, Shepard. Something real. I loved you.

Keep reading

okayhotshots:

Send me a ship and a number and I’ll write a thing. [accepting] (x)

21. Things you said when we were on top of the world. 

Kaidan feels like a child as he steps through the hospital doors with Garrus on his heels. He doesn’t remember ever feeling such a mix of emotions before. He an feel excitement tingling in the depths of him, spreading to the tips of his toes, but there was a part of him, that couldn’t let him fully enjoy the feeling. What if she wasn’t really here? What if it all the information they’ve managed to gather is just a bunch of hopeful rumors? Kaidan doesn’t know if he’d be able to handle that kind of disappointment. It’s why he hesitates approaching the front desk. 

Garrus rests a hand on Kaidan’s shoulder. He though it was only fit that the turian come along. Garrus is her best friend, and he’s been with her longer than even him. Kaidan takes a deep breath and looks up at Garrus. His friend gives him a nod, encouraging him to approach the receptionist. 

Kaidan swallows before stepping towards the desk with shaking hands. The last time he felt this nervous, he was anxiously waiting on some unknown planet for word, any word about the war. Now he’s waiting in front of some cheap Ikea desk to find out if the love of his life is actually dead or not. 

“Um,” Kaidan says. He’s unsure of how to go about this. The receptionist hasn’t even bothered to look up at him. She’s flipping through some magazine. “I’m looking for, uh, Teyla Shepard?”

He feels like his heart stops beating as the silence grows between him and seemingly disinterested receptionist. She reaches over to a nearby drawers, pulling a folder from its depths. She flips to a certain spot, still not bothering to look up. “Name?”

“Oh, uh, my name?” He feels stupid the moment that he says it. Of course she means his name. “I’m Kaidan Alenko.”

For the first time since he’s been there, the lady looks up at him, a large smile on her face. “Kaidan Alenko? She’s been waiting for you.” 

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